For those who didn't make it earlier

Wednesday, October 24, 2007

Things you shouldn't buy from 'the shop' #1

According to scientists you consume 122 calories an hour studying, so after a sesh in the library, thoughts will inevitably be turning to matters gastric. Abandoning the fascinating tome on gender and cyberspace, (you know the crux of the argument anyway - 'it's (also) a man's virtual world'), you beat a path to the college shop. You know what you should buy - an apple, a packet of raisins, but somehow you can't stop your eyes from searching the shelves until they make the discovery that will seal your snacking fate:

They've had a delivery of handmade JUMBO flapjacks.

Then begins the process of justification. They're made from oats so they're better than the chocolate bar next to it. You'll break it in two and have the other half tomorrow, (tellingly my bag remains crumb free). You'll buy a Fruit one - it'll be one of 'five a day' then.

Nearly three years on and you wonder why shops can't make clothes in the right size anymore.

Apparently you can burn even more calories by twitching as you study.

(Interesting study that - what exactly is the difference between moderate and active sexual activity, and more importantly are the extra 14 calories really worth the extra effort? ?)

So to retain your pre-student sylph-like figure *cough*, learn from this Laterstudier's mistakes. Either turn your back on the flapjack, or continue to fall for his *all-natural ingredient* charms whilst you jig around the library on the wheely chair looking like you've plugged yourself into the mains - the choice is yours.

What do you mean. 'How about my dignity?' Admit it. You lost all that remained of your dignity the day you thought buying a college Hoody from the same shop was a good idea...(my advice - keep the receipt and say it didn't fit your daughter...)

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